I've always known that I like things done a certain way, preferably my way, or as close to my way as possible. Today, I realized that I'm quite the control freak. I tend to make sure it goes my way, or else I'm not even going to let it be known that I'm associated to whatever it is that I was "working" on. Where did this obsessive behavior spring from? I'm sure my family is pretty easy going and willing to compromise.

We're doing advertising for something called Rainbow Week for GSA, and I designed a simple flier with only color in the title. We don't have access to a free colored copier, so we had to use black and white. The yellow didn't show up too well on the xerox, so we were forced to color the pages ourselves. Individually, the pages look pretty okay, but I hate that they aren't consistant. I need freaking consistancy damn it. Anger slowly boils within me when I think about how unorganized things seem to be right now. After all that hard work and planning ahead, it just feels like there are too many last minute decisions to be made. I know I can't complain because I don't constantly go to the club anymore, but I thought we would be more organized. I guess it's more like I want this to be successful more than anything, and I don't want to jeopardize that success with minor details.

My passion feels like it's gone. I'm easily irritatble, and I don't try hard to control my emotions. At school sometimes, I'm grinning like an idiot, but at other times, I want to sock someone in the face.