So the thing is, no matter how much I feel like I messed up on an SAT, I always get around the same score. In this SAT, I wrote about Brown v. Board of Education rather than Plessy v. Ferguson (like WTF did I learn after a year of APUSH?). I literally left 3 blank in a multiple choice section AND a two blank on the grid in. I left a vocab blank for each, and I actually skipped a lot of writing this time. I definitely felt that I did worse on this SAT than I ever did, but I went down like what? 30 points from my last one. This is pissing me off. I'm still in the 1900s, so I can't tell if my first time SAT was a fluke or not. Can I really break 2000? Do I really want to try again or not? Damn it, gotta go talk to my counselor. blah.

Should I just sign up for the SAT and see how much preparation I can get in at the last minute? I know I won't be able to study until I turn in college apps, and I'm afraid my brain will be dead by that time. Like my head hurts right now from all this thinking. WTH!

I'm pretty convinced that every single time I can't see the clock or the board to know when time is up, I panic and that fucks me up.

The SAT is a bastard because it made me wake up at 5 am to check my scores. Nothing else would have gotten me out of bed this morning. I was planning to wing all my tests. Instead, I'm sitting here studying, fueled by my intense feelings of dissatisfaction with myself.