For no apparent reason

I'm really getting tired of being yelled at, and yelling myself, for no good reason. It's just an impulse when someone yells at you to yell back at them. My mom doesn't yell at me that much when I actually do something wrong, but she seems to yell at me only during the times I'm making an effort to be helpful and courteous to everyone. I'm fucking sick of it. Anger is my outlet for all other unpleasant emotions, but lately, it's just been too hard on me. I can sit for hours basking in my anger and brood over the stupidest things. Time is such a precious commodity to me, so I can't afford to be angry anymore. Yet, I can't help it. My temperment has worsened over the course of this school year. I feel that if I give someone else respect, I at least deserve the same courtesy in return. I don't need anyone to be particularly nice to me, but don't fucking give me attitude. I respond with hostility when someone gives me attitude.

It's hard to find evidence to back up my own belief that I'm actually a nice, caring person during times like these. I'm so sick of myself.

I need a break from all this stress. I can't remember what it feels like to not worry about stuff. I really want to not be upset.
---------------------------

I've had this blog for three and a half years already. It's kind of funny how things haven't changed much (emotionally) since 8th grade. I'm still going through that angsty anguish stage of my teenage years.