The What If's
In life, every time you have to make a decision, you lose out on all the other possibilities just by choosing that one path. Your entire life is made up of missed opportunities and poor choices. It's not pessimism, I think it's the truth. By picking one path, you eliminate the chance to have a different life.
I feel like I lost out by going to Lowell. While it seems that I'm receiving a superb education and being trained for academic hardships for the future, I feel as though I'm missing out on the "life" portion of life. I'm completely missing out on the social interaction and the real drama of highschool. I'm not asking for drama by any means, but because I do not have to face the hardships of real social interaction at Lowell, I am not going to have that experience.
Seeing my friends the other day really made me feel like an outcast. Each of them are the epitome of a a stereotypical, normal highschool life. They have fun, they have responsbilities, they face hardships, make friendships, and essentially live life.
I think I used to be just like them back in middle school. The pressure was off then, and I hung out with the jocks of the school. I have a feeling it would have been like that if I had gone to Wash, and I can't help but wonder how much I would have liked or hated it.
If I was there, would everything be different for them and for me? I'm not implying that I yield so much power that I could change the way things turned out, but I believe that if I hang out with one person that hangs out with another person and so on, it would create a chain of important, influential events that can change the future course of events.
On the other hand, I've never actually enjoyed learning until I go to Lowell, where I realized that there is such a thing as a brilliant, passionate, and nice teacher. In fact, I've discovered several. However, I've also never been so stressed out, angry, and emotional in my entire life. With the influence of teenage angst, I've felt more anguish in this past school year than I've ever felt before.
Sometimes though, I just want to know the what ifs. I can imagine such a better life, but that's just foolish imagination. Realistically, I think life could have been less stressful for me if I chose a different path.
If I could go back in time, I would choose the pat that would allow me the most sleep. :)
I feel like I lost out by going to Lowell. While it seems that I'm receiving a superb education and being trained for academic hardships for the future, I feel as though I'm missing out on the "life" portion of life. I'm completely missing out on the social interaction and the real drama of highschool. I'm not asking for drama by any means, but because I do not have to face the hardships of real social interaction at Lowell, I am not going to have that experience.
Seeing my friends the other day really made me feel like an outcast. Each of them are the epitome of a a stereotypical, normal highschool life. They have fun, they have responsbilities, they face hardships, make friendships, and essentially live life.
I think I used to be just like them back in middle school. The pressure was off then, and I hung out with the jocks of the school. I have a feeling it would have been like that if I had gone to Wash, and I can't help but wonder how much I would have liked or hated it.
If I was there, would everything be different for them and for me? I'm not implying that I yield so much power that I could change the way things turned out, but I believe that if I hang out with one person that hangs out with another person and so on, it would create a chain of important, influential events that can change the future course of events.
On the other hand, I've never actually enjoyed learning until I go to Lowell, where I realized that there is such a thing as a brilliant, passionate, and nice teacher. In fact, I've discovered several. However, I've also never been so stressed out, angry, and emotional in my entire life. With the influence of teenage angst, I've felt more anguish in this past school year than I've ever felt before.
Sometimes though, I just want to know the what ifs. I can imagine such a better life, but that's just foolish imagination. Realistically, I think life could have been less stressful for me if I chose a different path.
If I could go back in time, I would choose the pat that would allow me the most sleep. :)
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