Rye

Eliza and I came up with the codename a couple years back when I first liked Rye. It's not even that catchy or anything, but it stuck and I sort of started to like Rye bread after that. Strange.. Maybe exposure to the name caused me to like it?

Well, to cut to the chase, I haven't felt the need to blog very much this summer. I'm pretty sure I have at most about ten posts. This summer was great, but not blog-worthy. In other words, because it didn't suck that badly, I did not feel the need to bitch or rant about anything. So the reason why I blog so much during the school year is because I'm stressed and usually feeling pretty crappy.

Today was a blog-worthy kind of day. I saw Rye on the bus for the first time in a little over a year. Wow, a year. I can't believe it's been that long. I saw him walk by the bus stop and I sort of panicked. I wasn't prepared to run into anyone today, especially not Rye. So I did what every mature teenager would do; I turned my head and pretended to sleep.

Eventually, I mustered up the courage to walk and sit next to him to say hi. It was awkward because it's been so long. The conversation was casual and he updated me on a few details in his life. His sister got married! WOW! It was short, but kind of sweet.

He has this thing where he just sits and grins a lot when the situation is sort of awkward but you still want to seem friendly. He's cute. I forgot how cute he is.

So seeing Rye is blog-worthy because I remembered how much I actually miss talking to him and actually being his friend. Most of the time, I let people slip out of my life because I don't actually care enough about the friendship to try to maintain it. But it sort of hurts that Rye and I aren't really friends anymore. It would be nice to be his friend again. I like talking to him. I think he drives me crazy, but it's also because of me. I somehow made myself think that he's doing something that will drive me crazy.

I think it's going to be there for a while. I want to be his friend. I feel kind of bold enough to try to patch up the friendship this year. This is really awkward to blog about. I don't really want to talk to people about it because everyone kind of thinks it's silly to feel weird around someone you liked so many years ago. And I think they forgot how crazy I was back then. I remember how crazy I was. I have written notebooks of how crazy I was. I ripped up letters that I've written about him to him. WTF? I was pretty irrational back then. Oh man.

I'm waiting for the next episode of Gilmore Girls. I should have taken a picture with Rye.